Thursday, August 21, 2014

Married for Life

This week, Shelly and Bob’s marriage is over.  Not because they had a disagreement or could not get along.  God took Bob home.

They were married for 50 years.  I have not had an opportunity to chat with Shelly about what made their marriage special, but the day is coming when I will. 

I do know they had a great relationship, one with no regrets.  She would probably tell me not to hold grudges – you never know what tomorrow will bring. 

They enjoyed each other’s company and were great companions for each other.  Life will be difficult for Shelly without Bob, but she will make it. 

We talked earlier today about the fact that God had more for her to do.  Personally, I think she can be a great example to the young married couples in this day and time.   I know I want to learn her secrets to a successful marriage.

Let me encourage you today to cherish your spouse.  Life is fragile, and we must be mindful to live each day to the fullest extent. 

Thursday, August 14, 2014


I’m on my way back from NC where I helped my sister prepare for her daughter’s wedding.  We were busy for almost a week taking care of all the little details to make the day special.  The setting could not have been more beautiful and the preparation paid off by everything flowing smoothly. 

It always amazes me how many things must be done for such a short ceremony.    The ceremony may be short, but the marriage is long, and things will be necessary daily to keep it running smoothly. 

I have learned as a wife, marriage is a 24-hour a day, seven day a week adventure.   It is just not an option to take my husband for granted or put him low on the priority list.  Marriage is bliss only when I learn to let go of my own expectations and meet my husband’s needs. 

Jerry is a great husband and spoils me a lot, but that can’t be my focus.  My responsibility is to love and serve him.  My life is so much better when I put him before myself.   

I’m thankful for the years we have had together, and if I had to give my niece one word of advice, it would be FOCUS.   After God, focus on hubby, then family and other things. 

In the child-rearing years, it’s so tempting to put the marriage relationship on the back-burner.  I’ve seen it happen far too often.  Once the kids are grown (and that comes faster than you can ever imagine), there is no relationship left unless time is spent connecting through the years.

How can we focus when life is so crazy?   Little things make all the difference.

Here are a few tips:

·               Be polite to your spouse when you are together.  Sometimes we are more irritable at home than with strangers or work associates.

·               Read 1 Corinthians 13 daily.  Insert your name and live it out in your marriage.

·               Ask him/her if you can get them anything when you are going in the kitchen or running an errand.

·               Defer to him/her when you watch television together.

·               Share parenting tasks.

·               Share housework and cooking.

·               Make time after the kids have gone to bed to talk and connect without the interference of television.   Our favorite spot is sitting on the patio together.

·               Work out your differences by listening to each other’s opinion completely and together decide the best solution. 

·                Spend time with other couples who have good marriages.

·               Make time for date nights and occasional overnight stays together away from home.  

·               Take time to be intimate.

Of course, this is not an exhaustive list.  I’ve put this together rather quickly.   Please comment and add your own suggestions.